For the last decade or so, I’ve been working on a method of quarantining bad or unhappy memories while finding a way of “showcasing” the good and happy ones. I don’t want to ban the bad memories, to a large extent, who we are in this life is a result of our experiences and I don’t want to wipe out what has made me “me” I just don’t want them unnecessarily poisoning my here and now. (after all, you never know when one of the less pleasant events in your life turns out to be a very useful lesson.) I’m still working on it. But I have gotten pretty good at the easy storage and call up of those things that I want to remember. Good enough so that those events that have happened since I’ve started this project can be recalled with nearly all of my senses, so that I can almost relive them. For ever so many reasons, I am so grateful for affirmation from others, that when I receive a compliment, especially in public, I can remember getting it in glorious Technicolor, with surround-sound and smello-vision.
So what does this have to do with Mark Stavish?
Nearly a year and a half ago, DH and I attended a pagan festival. Mark Stavish was one of the two featured speakers. Marks first workshop on the day that we attended was on spagyrics, and, I suspect, far too early in the morning for those who were up “festival-ing” the night before. Four of us attended this workshop, and only DH had read anything on alchemy. The workshop started as if it were a lecture, with the other two attendees earnestly taking notes. Then, Mark started asking us questions, and it became more of a conversation between him and DH (it was apparent that the other two attendees had no background in alchemy or hermetics.) I sat and listened. After a while, Mark looked at me and said “everyone participates, everyone answers questions...” OK, fine, although at the time I had no formal study in alchemy or hermetics, either. (I do, however, seem to have a talent for absorbing information atmospherically, and my long ago degree in the classics probably doesn’t hurt.) It was an interesting morning, although I did not understand all of what was said, when it came to certain practicalities, he and I had a common ground.
After a break for lunch, there was a second workshop, this one, better attended. The topic of this workshop was supposed to be lucid dreaming. Before he started, Mark went around the room, asking each of us our magical/spiritual background. The first half dozen people were Wiccan. Then, two young women dressed and pierced in their best “still trying to piss mommy off style” said that they were “eclectic” and one said that she was having trouble doing path work with tarot cards. Mark looked at her and said, “That’s because you don’t know what you are doing.” Uh oh, because now its my turn, and I am nothing if not eclectic. Which is what I said. (Well, minus the “uh oh” part) His response? “But you know what your are doing.”
If I were the better person that I aspire to be, my chagrin at the embarrassment of the woman next to me would outweigh the pleasure I got (and still get!) from someone publicly saying that I know what I am doing. But I am not that better person, yet. So, if you are one of those people that has said something complimentary to or about me, where others might hear it, know that you and the event have a special place in my heart. Thank you.
(and eventually, I will get to the spagyrics project of Thanksgiving)
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Malevolent Magic
6 days ago
3 comments:
I think I'm one of those people. I hadn't read this blog post before mentioning your blog on the Real Magick group this morning, I promise. :)
I'm with you entirely on this one, by the way. It's one of the reasons I go out of my way to point out the cool things that people are doing on my own blog. Paying compliments, acknowledging work, it's the easiest thing to do, and it makes people feel really good. It's encouragement, it makes people more courageous.
Sometime when you're in a meditative/contemplative mood, picture yourself sitting in God's lap, like a little child perched on their Father, and go over the good memories again with Him. It's sort of like the neo-platonic contemplation exercise I use to get through negative experiences, but it's got a different end-result. :)
(My own son was just sitting on my lap as I read your blog post.) the secret code to post this is "fulamsit!" Full AM sit. HA!
You are, in fact, one of those people, RO. And, I appreciate it more than you might realize. Thank you.Any problem with my doing the suggested exercise, sitting in the lap of the Great Mother? ;-)
LOL, the approval word for this comment is "notlit, so obviously your gynocratic ways are unilluminated. ;)
I wonder if there's a blogger challenge word-o-mancy book published at Llewellyn yet?
To me the "Great Mother" is Nature her own self, the Spiritus Mundi. She's the one that made the body-flesh in Hermetic creation myths, out of love for the first human made in the image of God. He saw the form, and likewise fell in love and indwelled it. So it is we are mortal and immortal at the same time, for the sake of Love.
So, it's rather all her fault we're stuck here now, innit?
But no, I have no problem with that whatsoever. I may just take your suggestion for myself too. My own mom's not exactly... well, she's a good woman, strong, efficient, clean, and fiercely pragmatic. A Libra thru and thru. I love her completely, and still live 1700 miles away, and that's about what it takes. :)
So maybe a Divine Mom-Lap-Sit is in order.
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